Archive for February, 2010

Je Vis D’Amour Et D’Eau Fraîche

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Friday, February 26th 2010 No Comment

Paris, France

I always thought acupuncture was a load of crap. What bored people with too much money invested in, a bullshitter’s art, the masochist’s feng shui.

After I shipped that 38k I felt really sick. This seems to happen quite a bit after a huge score. I always justified it with how mentally exhausting it is (at least for me) to finish off a tournament. Every hand can be a belabored process. I get so lost in the tournament progression, ICM, every hand I’ve ever played with a guy…its a lot. I love it but it exhausts me.

I was a real asshole on the way to Paris which just isn’t me. Naty and I got into a huge fight, for no reason. I can’t really say I had a point. I was just emotional and nutty when I didn’t need to be. I didn’t know what was with me. I felt slow. I felt in slow motion the next day. I started the fight again, then finally just went outside and listened to my iPhone for an hour while walking around Paris. The cold and Viro helped me chill. It’s hard being completely sober, after the kind of person I was, but you can’t take away cold air. It does something for my Alaskan genetics, I don’t know why. It cools me down.

I came back and told Naty, “let’s start today over.” We went to lunch and finally stopped being idiots, err…I stopped being an idiot. I went and got a really good haircut and Naty redid her color and everything. I still felt sick, but I was going to put my best foot forward. I got the idea to buy some champagne to celebrate us coming to Paris, but coming home I just collapsed. I couldn’t sit up and drink a small glass if my life depended on it. I felt like shit. I wanted to just sleep 12 hours, or maybe die.

Naty finally decided enough was enough and did an acupuncture treatment on me. I kind of let her do it because she’s my girlfriend, but seriously, what in the world could putting a needle in my foot do for my stomach? I can see blood vessels. I don’t see “energy channels.” I see dumb people getting their wallets lighter.

Then she put more than one. She put more than a few. I couldn’t move. She told me sternly, “don’t move.” The needles were deep in the muscles, in my arms, my chest, my ankles. She poured through her book and took her time with each one. She’d pinch, prod, and go “does this hurt? How about this?”

Then it got creepy. She pulls up one foot, “if your stomach is having problems this shouldn’t hurt.” She pinched hard. Just a twinge. Then she pulls up another, “this should hurt like hell.” Same technique. Same part of the foot. There should be no difference, logically.

So why was I writhing in agony?

I looked for the magician’s trick. “Do it again,” I barked. You can’t hustle a hustler.

She nodded, obviously used to the skepticism, opening her hand so I could see her using the same grip. Again, the foot where she said nothing would happen, nothing. She invited me to do it myself. Nothing. Then the other foot.

Searing searing pain. Her look, ‘I know what I’m doing now shut up.’

I felt like there was led in my stomach. My eyes barely wanted to stay open. I just wanted the day to end.

She left everything in me for about an hour, talking to me the whole time.

Then she took everything out and I got up, ready to fake a “oh thank you honey, I think I feel better.”

Then I felt my stomach. The led was gone. I moved more. Everything was gone. The heaviness, the tiredness. I thought I was fooling myself. I thought I just felt good from laying down and being nailed to the bed for an hour. Then I surprised myself, “you feel like drinking that bottle now?”

We found an ancient balcony outside of our window. Nobody else in our building has a balcony. We crawled out of our window and took some chairs. It was freezing but you could see over the rooftops of a thousand buildings, smokestacks in the distance, old churches, clock towers, dusk. It looked beautiful. We wrapped up warm and talked forever, going through a lot of the bottle. I felt…amazing. I was actually interesting. I was so happy to just talk and be myself. I wasn’t gurgling my answers and rolling over.

I’m a total believer now. I’ve felt great for days.

The next day we checked out the Eiffel Tower and went shopping around here. The Eiffel Tower was really cool, although the lines got old and it was raining. The view was unbelievable, but I’m afraid I’m going to kill Naty. This girl had never taken an airplane before she met me, and now I threw her right in the middle of Paris in winter. It’s FREEZING for me, and I’m Aleut.

Shopping here is alright, but Paris being the best place to shop is just garbage. If you love seeing shop after shop of delusional designers trying to cop you shit for 30x what it’s worth than be my guest, this place is for you. Not that you can’t get everything you want, but you have to sift through a lot of crap.

Wow, I wrote this whole thing about how the Camorra sells shit here, and how clothes are sold, and how everyone fucks everyone, and it ends with awesome deals. Then Paris internet sucked. Ugh.

Oh yeah, went to a crap bar and chilled with the worst indie rockers in the world. Naty started singing with the main guitarist, and I just drank beer and laughed at the absurdity of my life.

***

Finishing this in Berlin now.

Naty and I had a good time just relaxing in Paris. We watched a lot of movies. We watched Hannibal Rising. Seriously, whoever played kid Hannibal was so good. He was just sick. Plot was kind of standard and depressing for a Thomas Harris joint. Main kid reminded me of Nathanael in a weird way.

One time we tried to go out. I looked up good clubs and we went to this boat on the Seine River. It was pouring rain. Waiting in line in a harbor at midnight was something I didn’t really enjoy. I’m not a fisherman anymore, there’s a reason you don’t hang out there during a storm. It’s COLD. And wet. And miserable.

Naty and I toughed it out. The bouncer was a cool cat, and kicked out this guy I felt real uncomfortable around. Was a total gentlemen while this clown went on, going on about his race and shit, because you know pissing off the 7 foot ripped Nigerian guy when you’re a fat ass four-eyed Frenchie is a winning bet. We got into the place and thought we were in the wrong place. It was a rasta joint. Naty was laughing, we’d come all the way from Costa Rica and came on Rasta night, which is as common as rice and beans in Costa Rica. We had a couple 10 euro drinks (god I hate Europa) and just vibed for a bit. I had this gnarly huuuuuge black dude post up two feet front of me and look my girlfriend up and down for like half an hour. Back up kiiid skinny white boy can flip the schitz.

I say “black” because I’m painting a picture. Notice how I refer to myself as “white.”

The vibe was real cool. Nobody disrespected me or my girl, everyone was pretty chill. It’s cool to see Turks, whites, black, everyone just chilling. There’s so much racism in Europe it’s nice to see people just get along. Just when people are high they gaze a little long and it’s a little weird. But yeah, I figured I caught the bar on a weird night. On the way out Naty asked me to check with the barkeep if we were at the right bar, and I found out I was, but there was a different club downstairs. We headed down the steps, the boat tilting back and forth the whole way, and I swear I saw my high school friend Cooper in a different body. Guy was throwing it down, but every time his techno was about to take off he’d start scratching. I love it but French are a fickle crowd. You need great electronica to get anyone moving, and this guy kept breaking the flow. I had a few screw drivers but Naty just drank water. I dug the place but it was hard to get into it. We danced for a few hours then bailed.

So yeah my old German roommate I called “Naty” and now my girlfriend I call “Naty.” Weird.

Our last day in Paris was great. Naty and I went to Notre Dame, paid our respects, and got some great pictures of a really cool cathedral. They let us in free, which was nice. I always want to go “asshole hypocrite” when I go into a nice church in Ireland and they want 20 euros per person.

We got some crepes, I got a cappuccino (god they don’t make you the same in Central America), and we went ice skating in front of some huge French building. I actually didn’t fall down which was a shock. We grabbed a cab and got a last minute flight to Berlin.

Only thing I didn’t dig here was the racism. My girlfriend looking Middle Eastern-ish doesn’t really help. I had a Turkish guy keep braking a foot away from me and glaring at me in the ice rink, spraying me with snow (wow you’re cool dude). Walking through Paris I had some Turkish guy go in front of his friends and separate Naty and I, saying something about me being confused, I’m with the wrong girl, or some shit. He tried to hug Naty, and I just glared, and he backed up. Naty said “I’m going to kick you in your balls.” Him and his weak ass friends parted like I was Moses. Faggots.

Odd, no one says anythinjg after a few seconds. Kind of sad when I’m half your weight, you’re five deep, and you’re still scared.

I just walk on. I wouldn’t care if Naty was blue like the girl from Avatar. These kids are just jealous, too much alcohol and hate in them, I have nothing but pity. Need to find God and a damn treadmill.

All right, I need to get a few good hours of sleep before this EPT.

Random Thoughts From A Seattle Poker Pro 2010-02-24 12:24:00

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Wednesday, February 24th 2010 No Comment

Grindin for a living February Week 3 (DeuceSeven)

Posted by Bond18 in Tuesday, February 23rd 2010 No Comment

February Week 3.

Wow!!!! I had one hell of a week. I fted a bunch of shit. I felt a bit snake bit at the $55 fo fts I made. I ended the week by winning a 33 and the ftp 26/28k. I managed to get in 130 mtts playing 5 days this week. My big scores for the week were:

4th in the stars 33/15k for 1.6k
5th in the stars 55/5k for $810
5th in the stars 55/5k for $790
1st in the stars 33/2k for 1.3k
1st in the ftp 26/28k for 5.5k

Exercise and diet didn’t go as well as I’d like, but I’m going to continue to work on it. I’m really too tired to add any more thoughts other then I feel like I finally got the monkey off my back winning my 1st $26. I decided that my updates aren’t going to include roi cuz it’s too damn hard to figure given I play a lot of kos and a few rebuys in a session.

Week:
MTTs played: 130
Cashes: 16
FTs: 7
Profit: $8,199.25

Month to date:
Profit: $7,637.13

Year to date:
Profit: $8,407.71

Latest affairs incl. Victory Poker

Posted by AndyMcLEOD in Tuesday, February 23rd 2010 No Comment

Hey guys,

It’s been a pretty long and stressful summer (yep, it’s still summer down under!) but exciting times are ahead. I had a real good week betting on the golf a couple of weeks ago and after a nice win in the iPoker major yesterday for around 56k yesterday I’m going to take it easy on grinding for a while to concentrate on some other things.

I’m particularly excited, funnily enough, to take some time off playing and start doing some proper poker study. The simple reality is that I have done nowhere near enough math-based poker study to be where I want to be. You could get away with this a few years ago and still do in tournaments now because, well, a few years ago the game was nowhere near as advanced as it is now, and in tournaments the difference of 3% equity in any given situation pales into insignificance in the overall conditions of tournament poker. In the last probably 6-8 months of playing cash online it’s become more and more apparent to me that I have a few small areas of uncertainty in my play specifically in the limit games, so I’m looking forward to finally taking some time out to spend on sharpening all aspects of my game that require it. Not only will that give me the ultimate confidence to be able to sit in any lineup, but I believe it will also help my tilt control a great deal - for some reason I’ve always found it hard to tilt by choosing a sub-optimal gambling play when I know exactly what the correct one is instantly; rather it’s been whenever there is any ambiguity in the decision ("peeling one more here may be good?") where I allow myself to spew.

The most exciting news by far though is that I’m now on board with Victory Poker. VP is a new site that’s launched on the Everleaf network (a small network you may not have heard of) and to say the least it has a pretty incredible list of pros involved. We have high ambitions and have a lot of fun things going on like a TV crew and a bunch of promotions in the works. We’ve also got our own support forum on TwoPlusTwo. I feel very fortunate to be involved and look forward to meeting everyone. I’ve been playing some low stakes games there when I can so feel free to hit me up.

That’s all for now, I’ll probably be back to talk about how much I suck at golf and ask for some advice soon. May even try to get some pics of my swing :).

Good luck at the tables,

James

Come play poker with James at VictoryPoker.

My Life = A DHV Spike

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Tuesday, February 23rd 2010 No Comment

Enroute: Paris, France

“How was your day baby?” I ask Natasha as she comes through our hotel door.

“Great, everybody was really nice to me today.”

“Oh, huh, why?” I wonder aloud.

“Because you weren’t there,” she quips cheerfully, before going to pack our things.

I’m on a flight to Paris. Theres $38,000 in my Stars account that wasn’t there two days ago.

Sometimes I do love my job.

I obviously got bills to pay and a backing empire that was collectively running bad for three months, but I bounce back fast. The swings make me sick from time to time, but I just have to roll with it, I have no choice. And yeah, I think we’re about to swing up.

I haven’t put in any work over my whole trip to Europe other than the solid three hours I got before I got set-over-set in EPT Copenhagen. I was feeling excited to play. I’m in great shape right now mentally and physically and have felt ready to destroy every time I’ve sat down.

Hyped up I just crushed. I was on my game again, and it feels great. I’m into it. This puts my total cashes above $100,000 over the last month with almost no real volume played. Of course, it gets separated between my investors and myself, and I have a bunch of other expenses, but that’s just how it goes. God, taxes are going to be a mess.

I must look like a millionaire if you just look at total cashes. I’m getting a nice cut from this but EPTs, flights, hotels, and meals aren’t free.

It was kind of a weird Sunday, the set-up and all. I wanted to play up till the $500 FTOPs and the huuuuge Sunday Million. Obviously, I would’ve rather won one of those, but it was nice to get moving in some tournament.

Naty went out and tried to buy some things while I set up. She came back and told me the Danish people were way nicer to her without me. I think its more they respect its my girlfriend when I’m around but I know it doesn’t help us when I have the thickest American accent. She said men went outside to get taxis for here and things. So different then some of the barking answers we’ve gotten over the last few days. Then again, its not too hard to get tons of preferential treatment when you’re a hot girl.

She taught me some painful-as-hell pilates in the morning, re-arranging the whole room to give us a work area. It really fixed some pains I always get in my knees and hips and was just a great start to my work out. Once I put on some gloves and went jogging along the harbors in total white snowfall, at night, with the streetlights glinting orange and neon green…I just felt real. I love that feeling. Cold air in your lungs. My legs felt so good because of the stretches, I just had to run. I was like a kid with a new toy. I just did lap after lap around the harbors.

Naty brought me my dinner in the form of kebab and fries. I wolfed it down with a Coke and just got to work. I was just on. I didn’t push my spots but I 3bet three times in a row when I thought it was right.

The weird thing was Naty watched me for like eight hours. We have this little thing in the Best Western room that allows me to play songs on my iPhone. Since the computer I travel with is typically the media computer back at Shugyo house its a complete piece of shit when doing anything else. It’s good for emergencies, say, when Tilt can’t figure out how to use its 2 billion dollars of rake money to make functional fucking software. But yeah, I left HEM off and iTunes off because I needed smooth sailing when I was 12-tabling, and I got it. I steadily built, and I got lucky in a few spots, in the early $100.00 MTT.

It was a really up-and-down tournament that really tested my patience. Every time I would get some leverage, some momentum, I’d get snapped back. I’d get caught in a bluff or I’d lose a huge flip. With the final two tables left, after going through 2,200+ people, I lost the most basic flip in the world for 90% of my chips. My mind clicked automatically to, “yey, here comes final table bubble 54 for Shugyo house.”

I had HEM on then, and Viro playing. I was on and studying. I wasn’t giving up, 14 BBs or not.

Naty was watching, and I wanted to be professional in front of her, and show her I’m not some punk ass kid who plays cards, that this is what I do and I am good at it. So I kept my cool, and I played some of the best poker of my life. I used every stat, every read, played one third of the hands, got lucky quite a few times, and eventually shipped the 38k. Oh, and I managed to lose my chat again. Here’s hoping it’s not a month.

The final table was just fun. I had to change gears so many times. I came in with the chip lead and we were fairly deep. I did a light 4bet like the third hand in. I love bitch slapping idiots who think they can outplay me.

All my friends were there and that’s always fun, just that huge noisy ass rail. I also got to shout out my boy 99 by two-outtering a set on the river versus K-5 (all in preflop because I run so goot) on a K-x-x board.

I was kind of freaked out by how fast Naty got many key concepts. These are things I’ve seen people watch 20 WPT episodes and not get.

Every time I went all-in she looked like she wanted to vomit, but when I won she cheered crazily. It was way more fun for me than its been in a long time. Obviously, me running so well and winning the damn thing made it way better, but still…we were prepared to finish 9^th. I told her how poker tournaments were, and it was just cool having my girl cheering me on, working from a desk overlooking the snow drenched streets of Copenhagen.

We listened to a lot of Zion I and Viro The Virus. She hated hip hop before but seemed to actually dig the underground stuff. She said I’m a different person when I play poker. I joked about it but then she looked at me all serious and said, “yeah, it’s true.” It was nice her finally getting to see me work my craft successfully and listen to my music. I could tell she just wanted to share a time with me and understand me more. That’s so incredibly open and cool to me, how she wants to learn about me, and not try and turn me into something I’m not.

I can’t lie, I got really lucky in a number of spots.

It’s cool, Mcmatto and I do a lot of business together, and we played a lot in the same district of Seattle for years, and he’s just crushing too. He got 80k+ or something insane from chopping that turbo FTOPs. The sicko.

Now if I could just get my own horses out of makeup, get Tilt to actually release my money in a horse’s account, and find this check that got lost in the mail I will be ballin insane.

It all comes at a price. I gotta remember how far I am from where I started from. I take this all for granted. Average salary where I live is $5,000. I earned last night what most people make in seven and a half years of hard work. Yes, it gets chopped down, by expenses and investors taking their cut, but that fact remains, a lot of money moves around here. Not as much money as people think we have but at least we’re making moves. We’re trying to break out, make that first million, and move into other businesses.

I kind of have my heart set on music and actually going to college. I don’t think I’ll ever be good at studying anything “useful” but according to everyone else when I wasn’t studying “useful” I was supposed to die. Right now I’m on a flight, laying my head in my girlfriend’s lap while she massages my shoulders and I write another blog post on one of my laptops while we go to Paris. I booked the flights last night, the hotel this morning, the world is my playground, and the negative dolts aren’t allowed past the gates. I create my reality, so I’ll do what I want.

I want to produce music. I want to make metal albums and hip hop albums. I want to make something as hard as Dillinger Escape Plan’s “Calculating Infinity” and something as smooth as a Perfecto Chills album. I love all music. All I do all day is listen to music.

I want to study everything, I want to write books, I want to start companies. I want to do what I want to do, study what I’m interested in, and help the people around me. I want to bring my friends and family into my business-related creative ventures.

And it all takes money. So my goal is to treat my body as a temple, my mind as a weapon, and keep both clean and firing. I have a couple more years of going hard in this business and then its adios. I want to make my mark before then. No regrets.

I’m feeling it.

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Sunday, February 21st 2010 No Comment

Moving Forward (Bond18)

Posted by Bond18 in Sunday, February 21st 2010 No Comment

The last week has been a total waste. I was correct in my self diagnosis of strep throat, and it kept me coughing and exhausted for the majority of the week even after getting penicillin from the medical center. I got two small sessions of poker in on Thursday and Friday but both times I was by no means at full mental capacity, though I managed to pull off a deep run in the FTOPS 300r which ended generically somewhere in the 50 something places. Otherwise I have been mostly lying about my couch watching movies and longing for the gym, which I returned to this evening with about half the energy as usual. It felt good to be there either way.

Mid way through the FTOPS event I found myself on the same table as infamous online player Chad “Lil’holdem” Batista. Around four years ago I recall doing an interview with pocketfives and mentioning that I thought he was overrated. [[ This is a content summary only. Visit my website for full links, other content, and more! ]]

Jeg Leder Efter Penge

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Sunday, February 21st 2010 No Comment

Copenhagen, Denmark

I need it to advance. I got more ideas now.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him.” - Buddha

***

My girlfriend and I went to the National Gallery yesterday. They had a ton of old paintings from throughout Danish history. It was a nice break, and really interesting. Her and I have both been having a hard time adjusting to the climate and food here, since Costa Rica is about the polar opposite, but we both can get up and do something.

The paintings were just surreal cool. Old depictions of royalty, Jesus, biblical stories, fishermen, students, everyone. You saw how these people lived. You got to wonder what it was like, what they believed. It was all free too. They just let the people walk in here.

We walked around the street where you shop here. It’s just a cobblestone road no car is allowed to go down. You can walk up this one church’s tower and get a fantastic view of the whole city, buy some roasted almonds on the side of the road, and (Natasha’s favorite obviously) shop at any kind of store.

It’s so weird here. The people obviously have no motivation to help you. Store employees run away when you look for help. We had some girl just shut the lights off and tell us to get out the moment it hit 7:00. Like seriously, it’s such bad service. It makes sense, since its my understanding their government just takes care of them here, and everybody makes pretty much the same amount. It’s the same basic flaw with communism, when everybody’s making about the same who gives a shit? Then again, I think about how cutthroat capitalist my country is and so many others, and how much I get harassed in those countries by store owners, and I wonder which is worse.

I took Natasha to a seafood restaurant here and I asked specifically that this one vegetable be kept separate from the fish, because Naty doesn’t like it. Correction, we asked twice. The chef goes out of his way to mix it into the mashed potatoes I ordered on the side. Like why in the hell would you do that? I mean, seriously, call yourself a nice seafood restaurant and charge like that, get my damn order right. Send your waitress more than once to me, even though I’m not the best dressed guy there. Show me some damn respect if you want a tip or my money again. I’m a polite guy and a good tipper if you just do your job.

I don’t know why that is with poker players. We all have such hatred for people who don’t do their jobs right. Maybe because we’re always referred to as second-class citizens because we’re gamblers and frequently get awful service, watching the staff favor idiot students who are 100k in debt with student loans whose mommies and daddies can just buy them the newest Tommy Hilfiger bullshit.

Maybe because I worked those jobs and I’d never do that. It’s not brain surgery, just write it down on the ticket. That’s just laziness. I would’ve been mad with my staff if they did that, back when I worked at a restaurant.

We saw another movie at night because I’m not really down on the clubs here. People look at us weird all the time here, and I’m reminded of last year when Jaka and I couldn’t go into a club, for no reason I could come up with other than he was brown. In Amsterdam I had some guy whisper a racial slur at us. I just walked on. Little bitch would never say it to my face, and he probably got rejected by a girl who looked like Natasha. Scared bitch ass white boy with no heart. The day he says it to my face I’ll show him how I react, but until then its not worth it.

I have a lot of guys glare at me. Natasha’s part Pakistani, and she looks it a bit. She has Costa Rican blood too but a number of people here are just ignorant, a dark person automatically equals a Turkish person. They’re so racist, they still freely refer to black people as “n***ers”. It’s still the one word I won’t write in my blog because I have no right. I don’t give my black friends preferential treatment or do that white guy bullshit where I’m always scared of stepping on someone’s toes, and I expect them to rip on me too, but seriously it’s whack to me.

So many men look at me like “you’re an awful human for being with her.” Others just stare, STARE, at Natasha like forbidden fruit.

Natasha pointed out the men are more polite here. I give the “back off” look to a guy and he does. A girl just sneers if Natasha does the same thing.

The people here are just hostile. I’m not going to mince words. I’m supposedly Danish, my mother’s maiden name was “Jensen” but apparently that wasn’t my grandfather’s real last name. Looking at the harbors here and in Alaska, where my whole family’s from, I see so many similarities. I loved this place last year because it reminded me of home. People here look like my extended family. It’s weird just…a lot of people are nice, but a lot of people are kind of weird.

Every time I go, “well that guy was cool,” Natasha goes, “you realize he was gay right?”

Ugh.

We saw Shutter Island. Naty called out the ending in the first five minutes, which was kind of brutal, but so did I so I mean…whatever. Leonardo Dicaprio just is one of the best actors of my generation. His performance and Scorcese’s directing reminded me why I love movies. I was into it from the start. The ending is sick and twisted, and leaves you thinking. I love that. I really want to read the book now.

I tried eating Mcdonald’s yesterday. My stomach almost exploded. I used to eat fast food primarily, back when I was younger, dumber, poorer, and on my own. I have no idea how I did it. I almost threw up. How the hell do we feed this to people? Like okay, when I’m in a rush, two cheeseburger meal with some ketchup is where it’s at, but you’re full of shit if you’re telling me this stuff isn’t as damaging as cigarettes and alcohol.

I gotta book my tickets today and grind out this massive Sunday. This is probably the only Sunday I’m working while I’m on the road, but I can’t miss this. I woke up at 2:00 PM here, but everything starts at 7:30 PM in Europe. I hope I don’t get tired. Naty’s going to get my meals and everything so that’s good.

It’s just after shot. All my horses innit yeah. Just pop off one, please. I don’t know how I get my hopes up still every weekend but I do. I also have a horse going to the next EPT, snowfest, so that’s good.

Business has still been frustrating as hell. Tilt locked up a money in a horse’s account and we’re in a lengthy battle to get it back. Tilt support is run by monkeys with half a brain, and if I ever meet these people I will scar them for life with how I scream at them. Seriously, you have five figures of my money locked up because my horse logged in from a different computer when he went home, you guys are idiots. I’ve never dealt with this kind of crap before. All poker is is staying liquid, and you’re screwing me. I also had checks lost and a lot of other crap. It’s all good though, I’m going to make it work, like I always do.

I’m feeling good. Going to go job along the harbor, in the snow. The snow feels good on my knees. My girl taught me pilates this morning to fix my back and shoulders some, and I feel great. Time to bring the pain.

Still Learning

Posted by Alex Fitzgerald in Saturday, February 20th 2010 No Comment

Copenhagen, Denmark

I’ve had a lot of people tell me I’ve gone tame. Sorry, I’m not a cartoon character. The sweating, pale, overweight, neurotic mass I was had to leave. I needed to clean up.

Living with Natasha has been a great test. We’ve almost gotten into some serious fights but we’ve had to learn to communicate. You spend so much time together when you’re on vacation. She speaks such good English but some of the things I say come off as so hurtful in Spanish but mean close to nothing in American English. It’s the same going back. Natasha can talk about anything, really matter of fact. She conforts you about everything a normal woman wouldn’t, but she’s not even accusatory when she does it. It just takes me by surprise, seeing as how before people tried to kiss my ass too much. I love that she makes me a better man, but being open to criticism is something I’m still getting used to. I’ve lived alone forever. The people I used to bring into my world never questioned me. Now all my friends and my girlfriend feel comfortable with it, and for that I am really thankful. A real friend tells you when you’re slipping. I’m just…still learning.

The weather here has been awful. Pretty much every plan I had in Amsterdam or Copenhagen operated off the assumption it might not dump snow every day of the week here. That hasn’t been the case, so we’ve just done a bunch of relaxed indoor things. We’re going to the National Gallery today. We saw a movie last night and walked around the main square here. We went and did karaoke at the only Asian bar. We hit the pubs.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (2009), we saw that last night. Heath Ledger cannot act. I’m sorry, he just can’t. Yes he was great in The Dark Knight, but not here. This movie had so much potential to be great and Heath just obviously didn’t look into it. It’s kind of sad. Since he’s passed on you want his last movie to be good. Instead, when Depp comes on and does what he does best (the most surreal characters) it just gives you a glimpse into what the movie could’ve been with some focus, a few rewrites, and some better pacing. Oh, and the kid actors, awful, just awful. Huge plot points get little attention. Colin Farrel still exists.

Probably going to go say hi to Wutank in Cologne after Sundays and then take a train to Paris. I finally had all my problems resolved, err, well, the important business ones. I had some things going on that were stressing me out hard, that thank you God are done. It’s so messy, poker business. So many people in so many different places. So many different needs. The law is murky, we’re all lazy people, and variance takes it toll.

No matter what I guess I have the money to take care of my own, and that’s all that matters. The rest is just a bonus. Going to go look at some Picasso and Matisse.

improving (nath)

Posted by Bond18 in Friday, February 19th 2010 No Comment

I’m gradually learning to structure my life better. I’ve pared my life of most of the unimportant things, and now I’m trying to stop wasting time and money. My bankroll can’t grow if I’m spending on unnecessary things, and I can’t be as effective if I let unnecessary activities take up my time– I can’t play as often and I won’t be as focused when I do play.

I feel like it helps my game, too. My mind isn’t occupied wondering what else I could be done or what needs to get done, because now is poker time.

In that sense, I feel like I’ve made tremendous strides. I still have many leaks to fix, though; keeping my A-game at all times is probably the biggest one; developing the discipline to actually play a serious workload is another. I’ve made gradual progress in both of these areas, but I know I’m nowhere near fulfilling my potential.

I can elaborate on this if anyone would like. [[ This is a content summary only. Visit my website for full links, other content, and more! ]]

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